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Of Reveries and Wordles

Happy Sunday, everyone. Hey. I gave you a day off, and I’ll post two poems in one so you have another day off tomorrow.

The first poem is a response to Brenda’s Wordle #42 and a response to Joseph Harker’s Reverie #5. No title as yet.

Another staccato rebellion,
abrupt — she cries for dubious
reasons — disconnected — ones
he can’t always figure out —
detached — breaks in an other-
wise peaceful marriage.

Long ago, he learned not to meddle
with the rhythm of her turmoils, to measure
the value of their love in her laughter.

When her angry, petulant face sends him
to the exile of his workroom, he sits
a while and contemplates the scar tissue
he has built up. Billows of metallic bile
dart into his mouth, as he puts the latch
to his thoughts and walks back out to stamp
on the fuses, to hug the ruins away.

Notes: It was the definitions of staccato that gave me the idea and, once started, the poem came fairly quickly. I had been working on another poem [see below] for Reverie #5, a silly one, because I wasn’t sure I could write a serious one that encompassed all the phonetic sounds, not in one week. Because I had been working on it, my brain must have been more open to hearing phonetic sounds and I noticed that the wordle poem had all the sounds but six. I tweaked.

I have all the sounds [I think] except ‘dark’ l, [x], and a glottal stop.

2nd poem in response to Reverie #5:

Ur-phonetics

It’s a riddle. An enigma. An engma —

Uh-oh.

Engma provokes a squiggly red line.
The computer dictionary suggests enema
engram engage England engrave encamp
enchant encomium, is not happy with engma.

Engmas not allowed, not aloud. Maybe,

if I tap dance: I got rhythm, I got music,
I got… toe heel shuffle tap… a little bob
and weave,  a little Muhammad Ali,
float like a butterfly…

Red line still there.

Engmas must be hidden treasure
waiting for an Open Sesame.
Joseph would not lead us astray.

You, me, let’s have a think and,
after toiling and venting, the good
Lord willing, meet back here.

Zany, huh?

 

Notes: I think I have all sounds except [x], and I had that, but didn’t like the word in this poem, even if the poem is a silly one. I had fun with this and that helped me get over fear of phonetics.

During the week, visit both The Sunday Whirl and naming constellations ‘Reveries’ to read other’s poems. With these sites, people tend to drop off poetry all week.

Happy writing.

 

 
40 Comments

Posted by on 05/02/2012 in exercises, poetry, writing

 

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Dismantling: A Response to reverie #4

Hello again. You’ll see a lot of me, between today and tomorrow, but I have a response to Joseph Harker’s Reverie #4, which you can find on naming constellations — the prompt, not my response. Joseph asks us to approach the writing of a poem with a specific strategy: to go from seed, to trunk, to branches.

It makes sense to me to show you part of the process, rather than the end result and a ‘how I did this,’ as I usually do.

Branch:    she gropes in the dark

Trunk:        images form and fade, names dissolve

Seed words:     blurred sight and brittle bones slow her down

Trunk:        she sits, eyes unfocused, brain scurrying

Branch:    life dismantling

I wrote one or two drafts, which I will not take you through, and then the draft where I am now. In the earlier drafts I narrowed the poem’s focus down to one aspect of aging, the gradually shifting memory. After the central portion above, I wrote the stanza which follows and then the stanza which comes first. Then I separated out the single lines.

pulled for revision

I like where this is going. I am working on a series of poems on my mother, so will appreciate any comments and suggestions. If something doesn’t work for you, let me know. If you think of a word, or anything really, please say. I won’t post a changed draft because of the whole submission thing, but will appreciate any input. Do I need to make her more obviously an older person?

Did you notice that my original seeds aren’t in the draft?

Be sure to visit naming constellationsReverie to read the other responses.

If you are wandering through my blog late in the day, go back a few hours and catch the interview with James Brush.

See you tomorrow, everyone.

 
19 Comments

Posted by on 02/02/2012 in exercises, poetry, writing

 

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Symbolic Frolic — ‘Reverie’ #3 Response

Hello. An early posting to respond to Joseph Harker’s ‘Reverie’ exercise/prompt #3: Symbolic Frolic, over on naming constellations.

I am going to write process first, and probably shall for most of the ‘Reverie’ responses. Joseph asks us to explore symbols, to go beyond the trite and create something fresh.

I found my biggest problem, other than coming up with symbols, was figuring out whether I had a symbol, or an extended metaphor. Was I comparing two unlike things, or was what I picked representing something? I’m still not sure, possibly because I chose something that might work as both [and isn’t all that unlike now that I am writing this. Sigh.]

I began with three possible themes [all of which tie together…I’m thinking another poem…], jotting brief associations for each; settled on one theme and wrote more notes. I listed the trite associations, the generalizations I wanted to avoid. I picked the symbol I wanted to work with and went with one rather than two or three [keeping in mind the other poem I am now working on].

The poem itself was not a problem, but I now think I have a simile in disguise.

Pieces

Something had knocked
the jigsaw to the floor: pieces
scattered.

Long ago she lost the picture,
learned how the pieces fit, by trial…
error.

She spent a lifetime
putting the pieces together
painstakingly.

Now, as she picks up the pieces,
they no longer fit her puzzle, no longer
belong.

I hope you all are working on this. I want to see what others have come up with. I only see ViV, so far! Happy writing…

 

 
32 Comments

Posted by on 23/01/2012 in exercises, poetry, writing

 

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Response to Wordle #38

Happy Sunday everyone. I hope all are well. Brenda at The Sunday Whirl has given us words from a poem by Thich Nhat Hanh. Visit The Whirl both to read the original poem and to read poems by others from the words.

towards a light

fluttering
bubbling
breathing
rising to the surface
thousands grope
towards a light
in their lives
forgotten

wanting to rebuild
to have a gate
to open and close
solid stones to surround
thatched roofs
to cover
and the flash of a fire
lighting the hearth

thousands grope
rising to the surface
breathing
bubbling
fluttering

Notes: This poem is one of those that wrote itself, practically as I copied down the words. When I initially write the words down, I start grouping. Then, I go away and come back a couple of times and jot notes, draw arrows. This time, when I came back and ran the words through my head, the poem was there. No punctuation. I know. Revolutionary for me. I sat and stared for quite a while until I realised I was not going to punctuate and I might as well give up and go to bed.

If I may, I am giving early notice for two prompt posts that are joining the roundup. I didn’t want to wait until Friday. One is completely new, Joseph Harker, who is going to stretch us more than we might be comfortable with and that is why we should all race over to Naming Constellations and work the Reverie, which is what he will call the exercises. I have the easy part done and will endeavour the difficult part today.

The second notice is for Mary and Co. over at the Poetry Jam. They post on Tuesdays, a hitherto fairly empty stretch of the week. If you are a fan of colour, Peggy has this week’s prompt and it’s all about colour. And, you can also wander back through the other prompts. Can there ever be too many?

See you Tuesday for some idyll time; Thursday, for our first announcements — you can send me announcements at any time; and Friday for the roundup.

Happy writing all.

 
28 Comments

Posted by on 08/01/2012 in exercises, poetry, writing

 

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