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Poem in Response to Wordle #12

10 Jul

This was even more fun than it already is, as I rarely have a poem until I have thrashed around a day or two. And I used the words as is, if you count the a- added to buzz!

Wordle 12

A poem fluttered
when I saw the words,
a whim of thought,
logic twisted, instinct
a-buzz.  I don’t resist
the river galloping
through my world.

The Sunday Whirl‘s wordle — even if you don’t write, stop by and read some of the results. I’m off to read the early entries.

See you tomorrow for the next form; Thursday for a discussion of freewriting; and Friday for the week’s roundup of prompts.

 
38 Comments

Posted by on 10/07/2011 in exercises, poetry, writing

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

38 responses to “Poem in Response to Wordle #12

  1. Daydreamertoo

    10/07/2011 at 12:04 pm

    Very clever and very concise use too. :)
    Thanks for visiting me and the comment.

     
    • Margo Roby

      10/07/2011 at 3:17 pm

      You are welcome, daydreamer, and thank you :)

       
  2. Mike Patrick

    10/07/2011 at 2:48 pm

    Aren’t wordles fun? Yours is so nice and compact, yet conveys the joy of the inspiration’s flash.

     
    • Margo Roby

      10/07/2011 at 3:18 pm

      I adore them, Mike! And there was joy! I don’t think I have had a wordle poem arrive that quickly and painlessly.

       
  3. Laurie Kolp

    10/07/2011 at 2:49 pm

    I love this… a poet’s inspiration in a nut shell.

     
  4. anjum wasim dar

    10/07/2011 at 2:50 pm

    River rushed a-twisting
    World went a-buzzing
    Thoughts went a-galloping

    Instincts fluttered
    Fancied whims resisted

    Logic stood tall, proud
    mane gracefully a-flying
    Oblivious of the gathered
    arranged painted poem
    cruelly critiqued, a-dying.

     
    • Margo Roby

      10/07/2011 at 3:26 pm

      Interesting take, Anjum. I like the personification of each of the nouns.

       
      • anjum wasim dar

        10/07/2011 at 6:02 pm

        In the second and third reading of both poems I find your approach as highly positive in the words’ ”river galloping through my world’ which shows the richness of language thoughts and ideas waiting to gush forth’, where as I found myself on the depressed side a bit, when I looked at the words I was reminded of Dr` Sir Allama Iqbals poetic expressions when he refers to the incident in the time of King Nimrod and the Prophet Ibrahim

        ‘ be khatar qood parra aatish e nimrod mei,ishq
        aqal lab e baam kharri mehve tamasha abhi’
        It is a comparison of ‘love-ishq” and ‘Aqal-Logic Intelligence/common sense’

        the river, the world, the thoughts ‘ all took the shape of the ‘worldly aspects’ and instinct trembled , fluttered in fear at the whims and fancies ‘ that take away mankind from reality’ and then Logic too seems in pride as it stands tall, yet on the edge-where, as it was for the Faith and love of the Almighty that the prophet jumped into the well of fire ‘which cooled and turned into flowers’ but ‘logic ‘kept pondering…what to do…? here Logic is not looking at Creativity/ Truth that is the Poem’ which has been ignored, criticised and thrown into the well of fire” Poem stands for Knowledge and I really enjoyed writing on this idea and with these words.

         
      • margo roby

        10/07/2011 at 6:31 pm

        I’m glad you enjoyed writing on this, Anjum. I enjoyed your analysis!

         
      • anjum wasim dar

        10/07/2011 at 6:46 pm

        Teaching Classic poetry at masters level for more than five years I have developed a love of analysing poems.I had to teach ‘Literary Analysis as well and that added to the experience’You have written another great poem’I hope to see your Poetry Collection in Book form soon , m!

         
  5. Mary

    10/07/2011 at 3:02 pm

    Margo, I like the mental picture of a poem fluttering. You really wrote a compact poem, and it has the feel of a poem that pretty much wrote itself!

     
    • Margo Roby

      10/07/2011 at 3:23 pm

      It did, Mary. When I copy the wordle words I place them in four columns and start the likely, or interesting, connections. The words in the poem are almost in the order I wrote them down.

       
  6. Donna Vorreyer

    10/07/2011 at 4:52 pm

    I really like that last line – the river galloping is a wonderful image of being overwhelmed with words – in a good way!

     
    • margo roby

      10/07/2011 at 5:57 pm

      Donna! Hello and thank you!

      margo

       
  7. wordsandthoughtspjs

    10/07/2011 at 5:32 pm

    Margo, a concise piece of writing, which conveys the message very well. Nicely done.

    Pamela

     
  8. margo roby

    10/07/2011 at 5:57 pm

    As always, Pamela, thank you.

     
  9. 1sojournal

    10/07/2011 at 7:33 pm

    We were obviously on a similar wavelength. I like how concise your write is. And also admire your ability to stay with the original words as written. I always have to mess with some of them. But, am really beginning to find a lot of satisfaction in doing them each week. Glad yours came fast and flowed as well as the river.

    Elizabeth

    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/

     
    • margo roby

      10/07/2011 at 7:55 pm

      I promise, Elizabeth, I usually play merry hell with the word forms, but thought I would see if could stick with the originals. Now that I have I’ll probably go back to messing with them. I agree re the satisfaction. I derive much pleasure knowing the next wordle is just a week away.

      margo

       
  10. pmwanken

    10/07/2011 at 9:40 pm

    What fun!!

    As always, I love the diversity offered through our various perspectives on the words. I enjoyed your flash of inspiration.

    And now….to wait a WHOLE WEEK for the NEXT wordle!! ;)

    (You: “just” a week away / Me: “a whole” week… see…all about perspective! LOL)

    ~Paula

     
    • margo roby

      10/07/2011 at 10:39 pm

      About half-way through the week, Paula, my brain is screaming: “Is it Sunday yet?” I look forward to the wordles with increasing joy!

      margo

       
  11. vivinfrance

    11/07/2011 at 3:37 am

    Two minds with but a similar thought! I like yours, it is concise, precise, and fun.

     
    • margo roby

      11/07/2011 at 11:23 am

      Thanks, Viv. I wanted to use the words in their original form [something I rarely do] and the easiest way to do that is concise.

       
  12. nan

    11/07/2011 at 10:16 am

    Nice and neat, and I agree with the others: fun. I love the image of the poem fluttering. The ending is perfect.

     
  13. margo roby

    11/07/2011 at 11:25 am

    Thank you, Nan. I just realised with your comment that the poem moves from fluttering to galloping as it forms. You would thing in a short piece that’s my own I would notice :)

     
  14. Susannah

    11/07/2011 at 2:22 pm

    That is beautiful!

    I loved. . .

    “A poem fluttered
    when I saw the words,”

    That to me says it all! That is exactly what happens. Wonderful. :-)

     
  15. Traci B

    11/07/2011 at 3:47 pm

    Great write, Margo! I enjoyed the fluidity of this one. :)

    You mentioned having to modify the word forms often and that this time you tried to keep with the way they appeared in the wordle. I’ve been able to keep to the forms most of the time, but the last two weeks have found me changing them all over the place. Good think we’re not “required” to keep the words in their original forms, or even to use all of them. ;)

     
    • Margo Roby

      11/07/2011 at 5:20 pm

      Thanks, Traci :)

      Good indeed! But, having said that I like the challenge…of using all the words. I suspect I will go back to my changing the words if it’s needed for the poem to work :D

       
  16. Donna Kiser

    11/07/2011 at 7:55 pm

    I ‘love’ a river galloping through my world. :)
    dk

     
    • margo roby

      11/07/2011 at 8:11 pm

      Thank you, Donna. I love that Brenda gives us the words that allow us to come up with what we do!

       
  17. brenda w

    12/07/2011 at 7:48 am

    Margo, Thank you first for all of your kind words. I see your reply to Donna right above the comment box. ;) I love the creativity you all bring to the words. This piece is incredible. You capture a poet’s journey in so few words. Tight & intelligent.

     
    • margo roby

      12/07/2011 at 12:22 pm

      Lol, Brenda! Can’t stay away from us or afraid you’ll come back to a mountain of email?

      We really couldn’t do what we do if you didn’t start us. We might write other poems but not the ones you start us on. It’s a joy each Sunday to see what you give us.

      And thank you for your words on my result this week.

      margo

       
  18. Susannah

    12/07/2011 at 8:12 am

    “I don’t resist
    the river galloping
    through my world”

    I loved that! And enjoyed your concise piece.

    I find it fascinating where the wordle words lead us all.

    Nicely done!

     
  19. margo roby

    12/07/2011 at 12:25 pm

    Thank you, Susannah. It’s funny how important word choice is. My original line used can’t instead of don’t. What a difference it makes.

    And I agree, it’s fun to see where we go, who takes a similar path, who strikes out on a new idea, and to know we get to do this every week.

    margo

     
  20. Marianne

    16/07/2011 at 12:35 pm

    Brilliant little gem here, Margo! I love concise and compact.

     
  21. margo roby

    16/07/2011 at 5:37 pm

    Thank you, Marianne. I do too! Especially as I tend towards long poems.

    margo

     
  22. Mr. Walker

    24/07/2011 at 11:46 am

    Margo, I like this. The ending is like a mantra. I will heed your advice and not “resist / the river galloping / through my world.” – whether that river is my children or writing poetry.

    Richard

     
    • margo roby

      27/07/2011 at 5:18 pm

      You enhance the image even more, Richard, by reminding us we have other rivers that can take us to wonderful places. Thank you for that.

      margo

       

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